That's a Bit Gay!

I recon this guy is BUILDING his closet.

Now, sometimes I just don’t understand why people stay in the closet. Sure – I can understand why some people are scared about coming out, but personally, as soon as I knew I liked cock, I was bi… until I thought about it, and realised I never even liked the pussy. Ever. Period. But recently, I came across a closet case who wouldn’t do the simplest of tasks.

The thing that amuses me the most is how closeted guys are so insistent on being “discreet”. Like – come on. It’s not as if you’re gonna walk into my place, and actually know someone on the street while you’re walking in the house, or know one of my housemates. Paranoid much?

On a recent overnight trip to a country town, I witnessed paranoia to a WHOLE new level. I hopped on the internet to score a fuck – seeing I had the motel room to myself – and came across a guy who was in town for the night from Sydney. Perfect – you’d think [especially seeing he was the only one who was under 30 – I know – I’m a fussy cunt]. After some web chat on how much I was turning him on and how he was going to fuck me [while I was watching TV, eating, and updating my Facebook - clearly I was into it] he asked if I had condoms and lube. Well, of course I had condoms, but it’s not as if I take a travel pack of lube everywhere I go…

So, he wanted me to go to the nearest servo to buy some. I was fine where I was, so I told him he could buy some on the way when he drove over. I will never forget his response: “I can’t buy it man, the attendant might think I’m gay”. Wait. What? NO!? I rolled my eyes, and responded with “who gives a shit man – you’re from a different city anyway!?”

Clearly I wasn’t THAT keen for the fuck, or else I would have gone across the road for the lube – or even spat on the guys cock before it went in. HEY – when you want it – you do anything. But he wasn’t that hot, and I was content in watching a bit of amateur porn and jerking off.

I ended up telling him to get himself out of the closet ‘cause he wasn’t doing himself any good in there. He replied with “that’s not very nice”, where I laughed and said I didn’t care for the situation. All heart I am! … and for that – I now carry travel lube.